#YesAllWomen

 I could have titled this #NotAllMen which was the original hashtag that started trending when the Me Too movement started and more and more women started speaking about harassment and sexual violence they faced. 

Women are not stupid. We know that not all men are sexist. We know that not all men are sexual offenders. But we also understand that all women and other minority genders have experienced sexism and misogyny in some form, whether at home, at work, in school, on the streets, or in the marketplace. But this hashtag reeks of a defensive attitude which blurs the real issue. When you say Not all Men, you are not listening to women! You are defending yourself. And finally you are sidetracking from the real issue women are trying to talk about and making this about yourself!  

Every day, women and other genders struggle to stay safe while trying to lead a normal life, achieve goals, and meet society’s standards. How many men have to think in advance about the path they are going to take to walk to school, college or work so they can avoid street harassment? How many men have to make sure they get all their work done while still daylight? How many men have to think twice about just hanging out at a park or pubic place with friends? How many men have to overthink their wardrobe going out or going to work and still be catcalled or commented upon? 

 

However, none of these measures guarantee our safety. The problem is not how calculated we are with our practical lives. The problem is that nobody addresses the real issue. Which is toxic masculinity and the inability to drop the defense and embrace really allyship by men. 

 

Also what exactly does 'not all men' mean? So as a man you never harassed a woman. And i am sticking to the least offensive types of violence so you actually read through and not shut down on me.

 

Did you not laugh at a sexist joke with friends? Did you stop your friend from catcalling a girl on the street in college? Did you not take part in locker room conversations at work about female colleagues? Did you call out a harassment and take action for a woman on the street? or like others thought 'she deserved it' because she was dressed a certain way? 

 

So if you want to really be an ally, try staying quiet for a while and actually listening to what the thousands upon thousands of women discussing this are saying.

Source: Reddit

#EndViolence #BeInclusive

 

The International Day of Persons with Disabilities is marked on the 3^rd of December. And we also have the 16 Days of Activism against Gender Based Violence (GBV) which is marked from 23^rd November to 10^th December every year. The overlap of these very significant campaigns is also what I want to focus on today.

Globally, 18 per cent of the female population has a disability (WHO), and many of these women are at higher risk of GBV than those without disabilities owing to the multiple and intersecting forms of discrimination they face. The intersection of disability with factors such as sex, age, gender identity, sexual orientation, religion, race, ethnicity, and economic situation also affects the experiences and services on GBV.

But I am not here to discuss numbers and global strategies and policies and what the UNCRPD says or not. I want to discuss how I have seen the impact on young girls and women with disabilities who experience violence and hopefully trigger conversation around what we can do to prevent and respond to it.

I think one of my early exposure and understanding of this issue was prompted by an interaction I had with a young person with disability who recounted to me an incident about how at a public place she had to get to, there were no ramps or lifts and so the only solution was for her to be carried with her wheelchair for which she had to depend on some random strangers. And then to prevent her from falling while they precariously lifted her, some of these strangers held her arms and legs and parts of her body. She said she felt violated to be touched all over by strangers, at their pity and to have to endure this to access a public space that was her right to access. She spoke that while this may not count as some horrific case of gender based violence, it was to her a violent experience after which it took her again months to want to step out again. And this is a young person with privilege to have a wheelchair and access to counselling that helped her overcome her trauma from this incident.

But imagine all those that don’t and we have already seen how they are more vulnerable to all forms of violence. Unfortunately most organisations working on issues around GBV have not integrated the disability lens in their work. For example, do one stop crisis centres have sign language experts or special educators that can help communicate with girls with various forms of disabilities. A lot of material for awareness is not really accessible to the visually impaired. Even websites providing information are not accessible to many, something that I was faced with when while recruiting a visually impaired colleague, she gave me this feedback. Technology has really moved ahead and assistive support is available but we need to incorporate these in our design and strategies in a conscious way.

As per the Press Information Bureau, over 700 one stop centres are functional across India. However do we know if they have had a disability lens audit? Can we really ensure that these centres can cater to women and girls with various kinds of disabilities? This is another quick win and could go a long way in making our GBV services inclusive and accessible to all.

Moreover all training of social workers, medical practitioners, counsellors, justice workers need to be integrated with knowledge and skills on working with clients with disabilities. Recently UNICEF has launched a competency framework for the social workforce ensuring it is disability inclusive. The more and more this is adopted and then social workers are provided with these skills, the integration of services will be possible. A critical part ofcourse of these trainings need to also be the empathy and altitudinal changes. Only this can ensure that services are not just available but provided with dignity.

Which brings me to the last part, with need for working on an enabling environment through awareness and education on disability inclusion to aim towards zero discrimination for persons with disabilities and especially to shine a light on the vulnerability to GBV of this segment. This will go a long way in prevention as well as mitigation of risks and response. Leaving you with some images from a social media campaign I am very proud of which very seamlessly included disability in the communication.

 

This post is a part of “International Day of Disabled Persons” blog hop hosted by Sakshi Varma – Tripleamommy. #IDPD2023Bloghop. Access all posts of this bloghop at https://tripleamommy.com/2023/11/30/championing-diversity-uniting-voices-commemorating-idpd-together/. Please also visit www.tripleamommy.com

Boots on the ground- finally!

 

Hargesia is the capital of Somaliland, which has claimed its own independence, though not yet internationally recognized as a country on its own. It is relatively peaceful compared to the rest of Somalia though in recent times some of their areas to the east have seen some conflict over some contested territories. I took the commercial flight to Hargesia from Mogadishu. Turns out the domestic airport is even more chaotic than the international one and while initially deciding to brave it myself, I ended up calling up my Man Friday – Shinoo the porter very soon, eating humble pie yet again about my ability to negotiate chaos.

 

The arrival at Hargesia was uneventful except for the part where they stamped my passport with their own visa and collected a fee for it! One must give it up for self determination confidence of Somaliland! I mean now I have a visa stamp of a country that basically does not exist! The hotel I realized is basically a hostpost of expats in Somaliland and it was nice to be in a big room with large windows after being cooped up in the Mog prison. I spent the first day on online calls near the window for as long as I could.

The next few days were spent in a whirlwind of programme visits, meetings and partner discussions and basically being able to move around without security escorts, stop and have coffee at cafes, eat out at restaurants, even walk around freely during the day! This was so different from Mog that I really enjoyed myself learning about the work there. While a lot were meetings with Government there, there was one visit to a safehouse for survivors of Gender based violence and an interaction with young people part of our upskilling programme, that truly left a mark on the dedication and efforts of our partners to make a difference in this very challenging context.

The highlight perhaps for me was a visit to the old city and main market where my colleagues took me and honestly it felt so nice to be able to have this immersive experience. Hargesia is famous for its gold market and I decided to pay a visit there as well. It was super interesting to see how gold was being sold by the street side like fruits or vegetables! I got myself a tiny something as a good luck omen which the locals believe buying gold is.

And just like that it was time to head back. My return was on the UN Humanitarian Air Service (UNHAS) flight. Little did I realise when I boarded the tiny aircraft at Hargesia, what an adventure this will be. Our first refuelling stop was in a small town by the Red Sea and the airport is literally by the red sea- it was stunning and I ran to take some pictures before boarding back again. The next phase of the journey to Puntland capital of Garowe saw some turbulence and trust you me that little plane did not feel safe! Everyone heaved a sigh of relief when we finally touched ground. Here we had to change aircrafts and by now I was dehydrated and hungry and really tired. However the flight had another stop before it finally reached Mog. A real hop on hop off, air tour of Somalia! Next time, I am flying commercial for sure.

Pictures below : 1) the UNHAS flight experience 2) the red sea stop over 2) meeting with some young people from our social entrepreneurship work, in Somaliland the abaya and head scarf is a must 4) In a meeting with Minister of Justice of Somaliland (yep they are serious about this country thing)  5) the Hargesia gold market 

Surviving Somalia

 

It has been a while since my last update reflective also of how my days in Mogadishu has started to get busier. I have already been on two trips home on my Rest and Recuperation (R&R) breaks, which are every 4 weeks and trust me they are life saviours. One also realizes that most of us in such duty stations are basically living from one R&R to another, practically it makes sense to enable us to plan our time and work schedules and make our bookings. But also it is a huge mental health issue where one bonds with colleagues over discussions of R&R plans, the anticipation of the days leading to it, the goodbyes and welcomes and the treats that come when someone returns from a R&R.

In a dark humour anecdote, a rocket launched by Al Shabab that landed on the room of a UN colleague and destroyed it, didn’t cause any human harm as the colleague was away on R&R. Prompting some meme jokes around “R&R Saves Lives”!

Speaking of saving lives, this period was also where I had a very significant and perhaps life altering exposure through a security training curated and delivered for the UN in all places where security risks are significant. For reasons of privacy, I cannot divulge more about the training but it was perhaps one of the best life skills coaching I had. For me personally being selected the team leader and being responsible in a very real simulation of security threats for the lives of 20 team members was both one of the hardest things and most fulfilling things I have done in a long time.  And the T shirt we received as successful closure of the training with a slogan of ‘I Survived the S-SAFE Training’, kind of gives a glimpse into the intensity of it.

And finally armed with my S-SAFE training completion, I could finally start travelling locally. First stops were meetings with partners in Mogadishu beyond the wire or green zone where all UN offices and living premises are. Its quite an experience to travel in convoys of armoured vehicles wearing PPE vests and being accompanied by security personnel who basically also decide on how long you can be in a meeting or visit. Apparently not more than 2 hours to even 1 hour for some locations. I felt a bit like the POTUS honestly. However in reality this can be quite unnerving as well atleast initially.

Travel within the south central part of the country is also similarly managed even to visit community sites. So I decided that perhaps my first field mission to be to a bit of safer areas in the country where I will not be bound by security and will really get some time to spend with partners and communities. So I travelled to the northern western region of Somalia, known as Somaliland and its capital city – Hargesia.

More on this in my next post……….

 

A Prayer for Peace

A Prayer for Peace

As soon as I was allotted my room and I had managed to freshen up, I headed to office. I had lot of briefings lined up for the afternoon. These were pretty routine and administrative till I reached the security briefing. The first step in that was being allotted a bullet proof vest, helmet and a radio set. Fun! It felt a bit like movies honestly and I was excited to do my Charlie delta tango training on the radio.

As the briefing progressed to actual situation on ground, recent threats, possible scenarios in the next few months, the impending withdrawal of the African Union forces, Operation Black Lion (more on that later), El Nino threats, the acquisition of some sophisticated rockets by the Al Shabab…… I was tempted to call Ethiopian Airlines to book my return flight. What had I got myself into? For a civilian with a generally low appetite for risks, this was now getting a bit more serious than a Hollywood action thriller. The only bright part of this was that atleast my desk at office was next to the bunker, which basically is the conference room for the office. 6 steps and I can spring to safety. Yes you heard it right, we have a bunker in our office and a couple in the living area and one of the first things you learn is the location of these and how you get to them safely if you can when you hear the alarm.

And from the moment I landed ofcourse, I have been made aware that this security briefing is nothing compared to the simulation safety training that is compulsory for all UN staff which would give me real life scenarios of the kinds of situations we may have to deal with. Anyway, mine was scheduled for some weeks later so I did not really give it much of a thinking and focused on settling in and getting used to this new surrounding.

Essentially all of the UN and other international security forces operate from a compound attached to the airport. Within this UNICEF has its own compound with our office and residential areas next to each other. It is not a bad space given the circumstances with a pool and gym and individual rooms for all of us and a common eating place. Without my advanced security training, I can move in vehicles between compounds but not outside of this larger airport complex for now.

While I gradually started to understand work and dive right into it as is UNICEF norm, I was beginning to also feel quite settled in the new environment. Weekends were spent at the beach and brunch at the famous international centre here and a pool side party with colleagues, some grocery shopping, even exploring coffee shops in Mogadishu, one started to feel brave even!

Ofcourse the colleagues who have been around were always sharing their words of caution of not to take security lightly and I just kept saying in my head that they are just paranoid. And then the bubble burst. This one night when our security notification would not stop flashing incidents and the dreaded one to say that the airport compound was under attack as well. We were to shelter in place and not move out and even after the all clear, the security lockdown was imposed for another few days where we could not step out of the compound as well.

And ofcourse a morbid part of me cannot help but add to ongoing stress so I ended up watching Captain Phillips, Black Hawk Down and the White Widow in one night and being convinced that either the pirates, Al Shabab or general conflict will be my undoing. Ofcourse it was no co-incidence that these security incidents also marked the anniversary of the more well known Black Hawk down or the Battle of Mogadishu.

The Battle of Mogadishu was fought on 3–4 October 1993, in Mogadishu, Somalia, between forces of the United States—supported by UNOSOM II—against the forces of the Somali National Alliance (SNA) and armed irregular citizens of south Mogadishu. On 3 October 1993, U.S. forces planned to seize SNA’s General Farah Aidid’s, two top lieutenants during a meeting deep in the city. The raid was only intended to last an hour but morphed into an overnight standoff and rescue operation extending into the daylight hours of the next day. Somali forces shot down three American Black Hawk helicopters, with two crashing deep in hostile territory. A desperate defense of the two downed helicopters began and fighting lasted through the night to defend the survivors of the crashes. In the morning, a UNOSOM II armored convoy fought their way to the besieged soldiers and withdrew, incurring further casualties but rescuing the survivors.

 

We have just emerged from the anniversary of this bloody incident without any major harm and a prayer for peace………..

 

 

A Soft Landing

 

When you land in Mogadishu airport, the touchdown along the ocean is such a stunning sight that it takes your breath away for a minute.

Somalia is part of the Horn of Africa with a long coastline extending from the Gulf of Aden and down the eastern coast of Africa along the Indian ocean.  Somalia is interestingly Africa’s most culturally homogenous countries with 85% of the population ethnic Somalis and following Islam. Unlike many countries even the language is common across the country. It is therefore surprising to see the country so torn by conflict. Historically, by virtue of the coastline, it was a trade hub and then colonized by both British and Italian forces. In the 1960s they finally got independence and formed a civilian government. By the end of the decade, a military government headed by Said Barre took over, at the same time countering the move for independence in northern Somalia or Somaliland. By the early 1990s Said Barre’s government collapsed plunging the country into a civil war and conflict which it never recovered from. Attempts to have transitional governments and interventions of the western and African Union forces since 2006, has tried to deal with the insurgency and return some semblance of governance to the country. A provisional constitution was also passed in 2012, however many parts of the country continued to be under conflict with also a rise in the presence of Al Shabab militancy. Even now the federal government is not fully recognized in northern parts of Somaliland and Puntland and the southern- central parts remain conflict affected. Add to this the dimensions of climate change, drought and an economy wiped out from years of conflict and we have the right ingredients for a very fragile state.

So back to me and touching down in Mogadishu or as is known Mogadiscio (leftover Italian colonial influence). The awe at the beauty of the runway was short-lived as I walked into a chaotic terminal building, cleared immigration and was immediately surrounded by porters at luggage collection. There is a carefully crafted local economy of the porters and it is advisable to just use one to help you out the first few times. The other thing is that your cell phone will not work even if you activate its roaming because apparently no global service provider has services here. Thankfully I had been tipped to look for someone who is known as the ‘UNICEF’ porter who actually found me and helped me connect to the driver waiting outside.

The walk out of the airport to the car was a chilling experience. We read so much about the security and here we were walking through a crowded market lane kind of a place to unmarked vehicles lined up outside. Every fibre in my body was screaming this goes against all my security training, but the porter was confidently leading the way and I had no option but to follow. UNICEF vehicles are mostly unmarked, and the drivers just carry a small placard inside for identification so we know we are in the right one. Ofcourse it could jolly well have been a kidnapper with a UNICEF placard and I would not have known the difference and happily gone along only to realise later maybe that my country would be least interested in any kind of negotiation for my release or ransom. Mercifully these thoughts came to me later and not in that moment.

Good news was that it was not a kidnapping and I was then safely driven through bunkered roads and high wall lined streets to the UNICEF compound which would be my world now it seems for as long as I stay here in Somalia. Office and residences are in the same compound and while movements are allowed between compounds inside a larger airport compound, these also can get restricted at security alerts as I would find out soon enough.

Yes! I do!

 After a very long hiatus am trying to revive my habit of writing through this really old blog I had created in a moment of inspiration. This time it is to try and keep a track of the experiences of my recent move to Somalia for working at the UNICEF Mission here as a Child Protection Manager. I believe this is a very interesting transition for me both personally and professionally and hope that this will get a bit more interest than my previous posts which I think had all of nine and a half hits. So here goes.......

That moment when I got the offer letter for a position in Somalia was a strange feeling of elation and an overwhelming dread. What had I done! Was contemplating going to work in the world’s most dangerous place my midlife crisis? Do I need to learn pirate language in case I am taken hostage by the famous Somali pirates? So many thoughts, each worse than the other.

So I did what I do best to deal with uncertainty, started looking content on Somalia on the one and only Dr Google. And ofcourse it did what it always does even when you ask about common cold, it confirms your worst fears of a terminal disease and sure doom. Within minutes I saw media stories about it being the most dangerous place in the world, a travel vlog where said person apparently entered without a visa as a tourist and then nearly died of some mortar fire, and images of horrific attacks on civilians and UN Staff.

So clearly this route would not work for me to prepare myself for a move to Somalia. I borrowed a bit of all this ‘positive thinking’ influencers on social media, people I normally would like to block and curse for toxic positivity. But you know desperate times call for desperate solutions.

So I started doing the pros of this and decided to completely block out the cons for the moment.  First and foremost the role was very interesting, where I would be heading two pillars of work in child protection in Somalia on systems strengthening and adolescent development. This was more the development aspect of UNICEF’s work here while a major part of the overall focus of the work continues to be humanitarian. But Somalia had signed off the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child in 2015, making it the second last country to have done so in the most widely ratified world treaty. (Any guesses which is now the last and only country left to sign this document?). So this provided a basis for a nascent child protection system to be visualized in the country and a real opportunity of some basic work that could lead to sustainable child protection solutions in a state still fragile from conflict, climate change and poverty.

Conversations with colleagues who were in Somalia working now or in the past also seemed to confirm that there is a positive change in the country, conflict though still prevalent has reduced, the security situation is improving visible also with UNICEF expanding work in more and more areas across the country and overall, a good work environment. And the most compelling mission of UNICEF and boots in the mud for the most complex places of our work, kind of pep talk by colleagues.

So with some courage, tons of support of the partner and his willingness to take on child and household care, and a daughter who thought this would be an interesting experience in my career, I took a big leap of faith aided by a big gulp of gin or more, and said Yes! I Do!

Two months and tons of work to wrap up work and wind down a household, which reminded me again that I may need to seek help on my hoarding behaviour if I get out of Somalia alive, a zillion farewell parties and goodbyes with the family where I insisted on repeating my will for some effect and drama, there I was at the airport to board my Ethiopian Airlines flight to Mogadiscio.

 

To be continued………….