I could have titled this #NotAllMen which was the original hashtag that started trending when the Me Too movement started and more and more women started speaking about harassment and sexual violence they faced.
Women are not stupid. We know that not all men are sexist. We
know that not all men are sexual offenders. But we also understand that all
women and other minority genders have experienced sexism and misogyny in some
form, whether at home, at work, in school, on the streets, or in the
marketplace. But this hashtag reeks of a defensive attitude which blurs the
real issue. When you say Not all Men, you are not listening to women! You are
defending yourself. And finally you are sidetracking from the real issue women
are trying to talk about and making this about yourself!
Every day, women and other
genders struggle to stay safe while trying to lead a normal life, achieve
goals, and meet society’s standards. How many men have to think in advance
about the path they are going to take to walk to school, college or work so they
can avoid street harassment? How many men have to make sure they get all their
work done while still daylight? How many men have to think twice about just
hanging out at a park or pubic place with friends? How many men have to
overthink their wardrobe going out or going to work and still be catcalled or
commented upon?
However, none of these measures guarantee our safety. The problem
is not how calculated we are with our practical lives. The problem is that
nobody addresses the real issue. Which is toxic masculinity and the inability
to drop the defense and embrace really allyship by men.
Also what exactly does 'not all
men' mean? So as a man you never harassed a woman. And i am sticking to the
least offensive types of violence so you actually read through and not shut
down on me.
Did you not laugh at a sexist joke with friends? Did you stop your
friend from catcalling a girl on the street in college? Did you not take part
in locker room conversations at work about female colleagues? Did you call out
a harassment and take action for a woman on the street? or like others thought
'she deserved it' because she was dressed a certain way?
So if you want to really be an
ally, try staying quiet for a while and actually listening to what the
thousands upon thousands of women discussing this are saying.
 |
| Source: Reddit |
